museyboxy | Dogbeef Trash Repository

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Dogbeef Trash Repository

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[4/25/21 - DAY 1 (4/25)] *Garrett arrives in Boston, and Dodger picks him up from the hospital. Later they discuss CBT.
[5/26/21 - DAY 1 (4/25)] Coyote contacts Garrett, warns him about Dodger, and offers a few resources if he needs an escape.
[5/28/21 - DAY 2 (4/26)] Garrett and Dodger argue about Dodger refusing to defuse his door bombs. Later, Dodger tries bottoming and Garrett gets a chastity device.
[6/22/21 - DAY 3 (4/27)] Garrett earns his way out of the cock cage with knifeplay. Dodger leaves afterward and comes back bruised and bloody.
- Dodger carves a protection rune into Garrett's chest.
- Dodger bottoms again, featuring post-orgasm torture.
[7/16/21 - DAY 4 (4/28)] *Garrett wakes Dodger up with sex. Dodger is a big bossy brat and proceeds to prematurely ejaculate.
- Dodger tries to answer his phone mid-sex.
- They argue about adopting out the dogs.
- Dodger introduces the demon fleshlight. It spirals into violent, bloody sex.
- They have an after-sex feelings jam, and softer aftercare sex.
[8/3/21 - DAY 17 (5/11)] Garrett blindfolds Dodger and tops him to handle the frustration of being caged.
- Dodger starts up a struggle for dominance halfway through, and wins.
- Afterward, Dodger teases Garrett briefly before they have sex in the shower.
- Garrett safe-words during sex, and they pivot to softer (?) sex in bed, before Dodger locks Garrett in the closet overnight.
[8/4/21 - DAY 15? (5/9)] Garrett meets Marina, and introduces her to Max.
[8/19/21 - DAY 18 (5/12)] Dodger wakes Garrett up with gender-swapped sex, although he really overshot the 'kink' factor of the closet.
- They talk briefly about Garrett's new apartment, and Dodger changes the subject by inviting him on a coffee date.
- Garrett gets restless, and Dodger takes him on an impromptu trip into rural Mass. On the way Garrett heals Dodger's wrist scars.
- Dodger screws Garrett against the hood of a rental car he stole at gunpoint.
[9/2/21 - DAY 20 (5/14)] Garrett and Coyote talk about job-hunting, and Coyote updates him on Marina and Max.
[9/14/21 - DAY 21 (5/15)] Dodger pushes Garrett into gender-swapping, so he can take her out to dinner and be lovey in public.
- Dodger starts fingering Garrett under the table during dinner, and slips in a little of his feeder kink.
- They screw in the car on the way home, and keep going at home. Dodger tries out tail-fucking Garrett.
[10/6/21 - DAY 29 (5/23)] Garrett sees texts from Jason on Dodger's phone, and they argue after both taking truth serum.
- They discuss Garrett's suicide, and Dodger shares his fears about it. They also talk about therapy for Dodger.
- They argue about Dodger's drive to keep Garrett locked away for his own safety. Garrett leaves to move into his new apartment.
- Garrett texts Coyote the next morning to talk about possibly working for Dana's group.
[10/12/21 - DAY 30 (5/24)] Garrett meets Dana, they briefly discuss his new job and then go off to spar together.
[10/12/21 - DAY 30 (5/24)] *Garrett and Dodger sext to smooth over the rough night before.
- Dodger agrees for Garrett to meet his friends, and talks a bit about them and his role at Atlas.
- Garrett doms Dodger, until Dodger uses his safeword.
- They discuss the sex contract again, and get worked up enough to go back to screwing.
[11/12/21 - DAY 57 (6/20)] Dodger takes Garrett on a plane ride to meet Augustine in New York.
[AUGUSTINE - 1/17/22 - DAY 57 (6/20)] *Dodger and Garrett meet up with Augustine, who feels Garrett up before dismissing her for their business meeting.
- Afterward, Augustine catches them being cute at the hotel bar.
- They meet up with Scotty and Jazzlyn at a fancy Chinese restaurant.
- Dodger has to step out after Scotty and Jazzlyn leave, leaving Garrett alone with Augustine.
- They go back to their hotel room, and have make-up sex with a vibrator involved.
- Garrett heals Dodger's back scars, and they talk about his tattoos. Garrett marks his territory.
[2/1/22 - DAY 58 (6/21)] Dodger and Garrett head home from New York, screw on a plane and then again at home.
[PALO - 2/11/22 - DAY 75-76 (7/8-7/9)] Dodger finally introduces Garrett to his friends, so they can do coke and play Poker.
- Palo corners Garrett to be territorial over Dodger.
- Dodger and friends start betting on who gets to use Garrett's mouth. Palo nearly kills Garrett, twice.
- The next morning, Dodger does his best to make up for the night before, with romance and foreplay.
- Dodger almost immediately ruins it by going fully overboard with 'kink'.
- Garrett gets his revenge by topping Dodger, and afterward they argue about Dodger not being able to admit he fucked up.
[BREAK-UP - 3/24/22 - DAY 83 (7/16)] Dodger takes Garrett out to eat, but gets interrupted by a run-in with Dana.
[3/29/22 - DAY 80 (7/13)] Dodger and Garrett get into an argument over text, after which Dodger gets drunk and rapes him.

*Nipple Piercing Conversation Counter: 4

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Confusingly, as soon as Dodger gives him space Garrett finds he doesn't want it. Instead of letting him breathe, the distance just leaves him cold, betrayed in how he moves closer just a little as Dodger sits up.

"It's just the usual sub drop shit," he mumbles, feeling thoroughly stupid. "How could he love me if he did that to me, how could I love him after everything he's done to me, what's wrong with me for liking this, and... of course... thinking about how weird and deeply terrible it is to be..."

He sighs and looks down, toying with the edge of the sheet idly. This is all so stupid, and he hates how cold and sad he feels. Dodger is trying really hard, he knows.

"There's just... I don't know. I haven't said "I love you" to many people. Other than family, there's just been three. Including family, all but one of them are people I'm never going to see again. Actually, except for you, everyone I've ever known in my entire life are people I'm never going to see again."

Dodger wilts a bit more, as Garrett speaks. Yeah, all of those are valid. He doesn't need to point out that it isn't just sub drop between the two of them, that Dodger has done things that no sane person would forgive him for. But the two of them aren't sane, are they?

He doesn't really know what he should say, exactly, or if he should say anything. But Garrett wanted to be close again, so he settles back down and presses their foreheads together. Soft, intimate, even if he isn't quite meeting the other man's eyes.

"There's a lot of people I miss from the other worlds. I'm never gonna see them, either... I'm lucky I came home, I guess, but it doesn't feel like I belong here anymore."

He pauses, tracing a meaningless pattern on Garrett's chest and focusing his gaze on his fingers.

"I can't help you with most of those questions, though... there's gotta be some reason people keep coming back to me, but fuck if I know it."

Garrett leans against Dodger heavily, quietly appreciating the presence of someone who can so easily take his weight. It's comforting. Safe. (He knows he probably shouldn't listen to that feeling, but it's too seductive to ignore.)

"You hated him," Garrett says quietly. "But still cared about what he meant to me. Instead of chucking me in the bin or trying to get in my pants, you helped me. A lot."

Dodger's brow twitches a bit, and he lets out a little huff of laughter. Empty, wry, laughter.

"I really wish he wouldn't come up this often."

He gets it. Really. But Barry's name is always hanging above their heads, more than any of Dodger's exes ever have. Maybe he can kid himself into saying it doesn't matter, but he's seen how Garrett jumps at the opportunity to look again. Back in Hell, and in Boston.

Like he's looking for an exit.

Garrett sits up a little so he can look Dodger in the eye properly, never mind how loath he is to show his teary face.

"You wanted a reason why someone might want to come back to you," he explains, picking his words carefully. "For instance, caring about me enough to help me through losing someone you hated."

Dodger sets his jaw, hesitating before he meets Garrett's gaze. He nods, but the discomfort is written all over his face.

"I know. I know I asked for it, I just..."

He gestures vaguely, trying to get his thoughts into physical form.

"...Nevermind. Yeah. I guess."

He wants to get up and escape, but he doesn't want to leave Garrett's arms. He just wishes his chest would stop crushing itself at the drop of a hat, every time this conversation takes a slightly unexpected turn. He wishes he still had enough of a wall around him to shove the other man away when it got uncomfortable.

Garrett's frown deepens. That was clearly the wrong thing to say, but Garrett doesn't know what the right thing is. He knows how much his grief bothers the other man.

"I'm sorry." Quiet. Sad. He turns away and stares at a lonely spot on the far wall despondently. "I know it's not something you want to think about. If I had my way, I'd just cut the goddamn feelings out and feed them to the dogs."

So... maybe Garrett wants space after all. Dodger sits up properly this time, shifting until they aren't touching anymore.

"You're not the only person that misses someone in another world."

He stews with that in the air for a while before he decides he probably shouldn't leave it at that. He'd call it bitchy if anyone else did.

"I know I slept around a lot in Hell, but there were only three men I was really... Head over heels for. You, Francis, and..." He hesitates, "I forgot if you ever met my old boyfriend. Crippled Viking kid, named Ivar the Boneless."

Garrett doesn't really want space, but then again, he doesn't know what he wants. So he sits there and stares off into space morosely, feeling very alone.

"You mentioned him," Garrett says dully. "He was from a previous world. You did a lot of fucked up, bloody shit with him. A lot of fighting."

Dodger nods. He feels a little hesitant to dig into those memories - it's been a long time since he saw Ivar, and those feelings have been safely boarded shut so he could focus on the present.

"We knew each other for a long time. I forgot the first world we were in, or... maybe it wasn't this me. It doesn't really matter. He remembered me, and it all just... fell into place. I liked being around him, he understood me in a way no one else did. When I saw him in Hell I was- happy. It felt like a place we both belonged in."

This is a little easier without looking at Garrett, it turns out. He just stares at his hands while he messes with the hem of his shirt.

"Maybe it wasn't exactly like you and.... yeah. We weren't going to get married or anything. But I was in love with him, I wanted to spend eternity with him. And... I was getting bored of him, when he disappeared. I had all the drugs and sex and violence I could dream of, and I wasn't thinking about him. I don't even know how long he was gone before I noticed."

He doesn't think he's admitted that last bit to anyone else. If he was in Garrett's position, he sort of doubts he would want to hear it.

"My point is that... y'know. I get it if you get caught up thinking about Barry."

Edited 2021-08-01 02:02 (UTC)

Well, it definitely doesn't sound like him and Barry. It sounds like what he'd been hoping for when he met that second shadow of Barry, actually- which of course didn't happen. Meeting some new version of his lover who didn't remember him, but who fell for him anyway. Who... got bored of him. Somehow, the whole explanation makes him sadder than when he started.

Is this who he's relying on? Someone who so easily gets bored and forgets about those he claims to want to share eternity with?

"You didn't notice he was gone," he points out, shoulders drooping as he wilts and sort of withdraws into himself. "So what makes- made Fran different?"

It's not really the question he wants to ask. But it's close. The sadness is clearly written on his face, and shining in his huge, dark eyes.

Edited 2021-08-01 03:00 (UTC)

Dodger glances at Garrett, and immediately regrets it. Those dark eyes used to look so dull and trusting to him, so easy to manipulate. Now it feels like they're piercing through into parts of him he'd rather keep hidden even from himself.

Immediately he looks away, and slides his legs off the bed so he can search for his cigarettes.

"Don't ask questions you don't want the answers to."

He says it because he knows the question underneath it, and he doesn't have a good answer to that either. He can't think of anything that would be reassuring, anything that will stop Garrett from plummeting, and he just needs to smoke.

Garrett looks away, feeling stung, and nods in silence. That's all the answer he needs, isn't it? Dodger's going to get sick of him, and won't notice if he's gone. The only person in all of creation who knows or cares about Garrett, and he's destined to be discarded like a used napkin. Someone who has and will hurt him, abuse him, betray him. And worse- forget him.

Fine. That's fine.

"You smoke," he says quietly, getting up. "I need to think."

More like: sit on the floor of the shower, steaming until his skin turns red, feeling sorry for himself. Maybe if he's lucky, Dodger will prove to be the whiskey-stash-in-the-bathroom kind of drunk.

Unfortunately for Garrett, Dodger's bathroom is only stocked up with medical supplies. Way more medical supplies than would be necessary for anyone not in Dodger's line of work, but it all checks out - there's even a few bottles in the medicine cabinet of the glowing blue pills Garrett's seen Dodger take most (definitely not all) mornings.

Dodger makes a noncommittal little grunt when Garrett goes to leave, too focused on lighting up and calming himself down. He just needs a minute to breathe, and concentrate on the nicotine filling his lungs.

Garrett's absence starts to prickle at his back, but at first he doesn't really think about where the man went. He'd get an alert if he left, and Dodger's phone is never far away from him. He's nearly done with his cigarette by the time he thinks to go looking for him again, and Crusher has already jumped up to steal the warm spot on the bed.

And as soon as he gets to the doorway, he hears the shower running.

There's no moment of thought, no weighing of possibilities. Dodger knows instantly what is happening, and his cigarette drops forgotten to the floor. He tries the doorknob, knocks loudly for a moment, but Garrett wouldn't answer, would he? Dodger can't risk waiting for him. He has to get in, he has to-

Dodger teleports in fast enough that he hits his shin against the bathtub, and barely stops himself from falling in. He has to catch himself with a hand against the wall, and then slowly push himself back and balance. His eyes are wide with terror, staring at Garrett and suddenly feeling incredibly stupid.

Edited 2021-08-01 03:51 (UTC)

Garrett is standing by the tub, the shower curtain partly open and one hand dripping wet. His phone is on the counter next to the toilet, painting a picture of how he's been wasting the last few minutes, and the look on his face is one of utter bewilderment.

"Um... I can leave if it's really an emergency."

Dodger is frozen for a moment, staring at Garrett and then slowly looking around the room. No knife. No blood. And Garrett is... being Garrett. Everything is okay.

He opens his mouth to try and explain himself, but he feels like he'll vomit before any words come out. His hands slowly start shaking, and the only thing he can really do is to grab Garrett and drag him into a hug. One tight enough for the older man to feel how Dodger's heart is beating out of his chest, how every fiber of him has been geared up and ready for the worst.

Fucked as he is, it honestly takes Garrett a minute to realize what's going on. He wraps his arms around the other man, burying his face into Dodger's hair to breathe in the thick scent of cinnamon and very nearly moaning from pure sensory relief at being in the man's arms like this.

Then it hits him, and he feels terrible.

"I just wanted to sit in the tub and feel sorry for myself," he murmurs into Dodger's hair. One hand starts to rub firm, gentle circles into the younger man's back, a soothing gesture he used to like when he was younger. (He didn't, but they both remember.) "I promise. You know how it is."

Now that reality is starting to settle back in, Dodger knows he wouldn't. He knows it was stupid to jump to that immediately. But still he melts into that broad chest, the strong hands and the particular smell of Garrett. It feels even more stupid to be the one who needs comfort, but... that doesn't change that he does need it.

That gesture does help, though, bringing up soft memories of cuddling with his father on the couch and being carried to bed when he fell asleep. Yet another side of this messy, Freudian catastrophe of a relationship they have. All the more messy for how it drives him to slide his hands up to frame Garrett's face, and pull him down for a kiss.

"Sorry." His eyes are prickling, barely holding tears back, and his face is burning red. "Just- after that, I didn't..."

He bites his lip and presses his face back into Garrett's chest.

"Don't leave me."

Garrett kisses and holds him, but there's still a strange, sharp undercurrent of hurt in it. When Dodger pressed his teary face into his chest, a small laugh booms out.

"Has anyone ever told you how confusing you are?"

Dodger nods slowly, hesitantly looking back up and studying Garrett's face.

"Yeah. I get that a lot."

There's a little more hesitation, and one of his hands slides down to seek out Garrett's hand, to lace their fingers together.

"I don't know what I'm doing. All of this is.. new."

Garrett clasps his dripping-wet hand with Dodger's and looks down at Dodger's teary face. It seems to mirror the turbulence in him.

"It can't be that new, if I really am the same as the others."

"That's not what I said."

Dodger squeezes Garrett's hand gently. Funny how he's drawing comfort from the same man who's making him need it.

"Garrett, you know I'm not a good person. I hurt people I love, I get bored of them, I kill them. I don't know how to control myself and people pay for that. And I'm not gonna sit here and promise that's not gonna happen."

He leans back a bit, just so he can meet Garrett's eyes at a slightly more even level.

"I don't know how you're different, you just are. You feel different."

Garrett's frown deepens the longer Dodger talks. Yes, he knows what kind of person Dodger is. He's been hurt many times before. Somehow the warnings are starting to roll off his back- it reminds him a little of how Anders used to proclaim doom to the rafters every time they were alone, talking about what a monster he was and how he would ruin everything.

Of course, that turned out to be true. Sort of.

It leaves him feeling weird and unsettled, and he isn't sure how to respond.

"Well, I'm glad I'm the only fuck-dad in your life," he jokes unfunnily. "It would be alarming if I felt exactly the same."

Dodger frowns, and bites his lip as he tries to figure out how to patch this up. He's had fights with every partner he's ever had, he's had to soothe all sorts of wounds and pull them down from all sorts of metaphorical ledges. He still doesn't know how to do it properly.

"Can you come back to bed? Please?"

Garrett's eyes cast down to the floor for a moment before flicking back up to meet the other's. It's obvious that Dodger is trying. He's trying, and Garrett has a hard time resisting those eyes.

"Can you pet me and call me a good boy?"

He plays it off like a smartass remark.

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